The silent click of her computer mouse was the only sound in the entire room. Her roommate had gone out to get groceries. Wiling away time on the internet was getting pretty boring for her now. Just as she stretched out to shut the laptop out of sheer boredom, a ping sounded on her desktop. Bedrudgingly she opened the window and read the notification. An instant smile spread actoss her face. It was a mail from the boy she loved. He was currently posted on a ship, miles away from civilization, and this was their only means of communication now. Fleeting memories of laughter, long walks and cozy moments buzzed her brain as she cursed the speed of the net. She would change it first thing in the morning. Finally the mail finished loading. His ever smiling face was now fixated in her head reading out every single word as she went through them. She really loved him a lot and she knew that he loved her too.
But with the next line her world came crashing down upon her. Suddenly his smiling face turned into a surreal grimacing figure she had seen so a many times. Long walks gave way to longer fights and cozy moments turned into the one singular instance that had shattered her entire existence only a few weeks ago. Like a broken record playing in a horror movie, his last words were echoing in her head. He had broken up with her. And in this mail, he wanted to iterate upon the various reasons he did so. This was not the first of its kind, there had been a few before, all having the same end result, pain, cold numb and brutal pain. She read through the lines, the keyboard now dotted with tears, her demeanour no longer jovial but with a heart trying to pick up whatever was left after that incident. She had failed to give him the time that he deserved. She had hurt him beyond measure and he wanted her to know that. Every line was like a gash on her broken heart. It was the exact same thing that had happened the last time. Was she not made for a relationship? What on earth was wrong witn her? Why was she the only person who was failimg again and again at love? 'Love' and 'Relationship', these words seemed so not made for her. For the second time in her life some one had broken her heart but it was all her fault.
But was it really? What of all the times she had cried herself to sleep because he was the one who had hurt her. What of all the pain and heartache that she had gone through and was still enduring with a smile on her face. No one ever knew about that except for one of her best friends. And she was not the one reminding him of the great screw ups that happened in the relationship.
No she was not the weak link in the relationship, he was. Yes they both loved each other, true but she loved him no less than he loved her. And that she would have him know, ship or no ship. With a sharp click, the browser collapsed. She would not tolerate this any more. It was about time that she actually started living her life like she wanted to and not like the way he and others before him wanted her to. So if some one wanted her, she would be her true self from now on. A take it or leave it offer. With a snap, she shut off the laptop and lied down on her bed. She could hear her roommate now comimg up the stairs. 'Life is good' she told herself and wiping away the sole tear on her cheek, she turned away and drifted off.
The silent sob was the last sound heard in the room that night.
But with the next line her world came crashing down upon her. Suddenly his smiling face turned into a surreal grimacing figure she had seen so a many times. Long walks gave way to longer fights and cozy moments turned into the one singular instance that had shattered her entire existence only a few weeks ago. Like a broken record playing in a horror movie, his last words were echoing in her head. He had broken up with her. And in this mail, he wanted to iterate upon the various reasons he did so. This was not the first of its kind, there had been a few before, all having the same end result, pain, cold numb and brutal pain. She read through the lines, the keyboard now dotted with tears, her demeanour no longer jovial but with a heart trying to pick up whatever was left after that incident. She had failed to give him the time that he deserved. She had hurt him beyond measure and he wanted her to know that. Every line was like a gash on her broken heart. It was the exact same thing that had happened the last time. Was she not made for a relationship? What on earth was wrong witn her? Why was she the only person who was failimg again and again at love? 'Love' and 'Relationship', these words seemed so not made for her. For the second time in her life some one had broken her heart but it was all her fault.
But was it really? What of all the times she had cried herself to sleep because he was the one who had hurt her. What of all the pain and heartache that she had gone through and was still enduring with a smile on her face. No one ever knew about that except for one of her best friends. And she was not the one reminding him of the great screw ups that happened in the relationship.
No she was not the weak link in the relationship, he was. Yes they both loved each other, true but she loved him no less than he loved her. And that she would have him know, ship or no ship. With a sharp click, the browser collapsed. She would not tolerate this any more. It was about time that she actually started living her life like she wanted to and not like the way he and others before him wanted her to. So if some one wanted her, she would be her true self from now on. A take it or leave it offer. With a snap, she shut off the laptop and lied down on her bed. She could hear her roommate now comimg up the stairs. 'Life is good' she told herself and wiping away the sole tear on her cheek, she turned away and drifted off.
The silent sob was the last sound heard in the room that night.
1 comments:
shows how complicated relationships can get.....very well written...
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